I love New Years and I love a fresh start as much, and maybe more, than the next person, but I don’t agree with or care for resolutions. I think they set us up for failure and for limitations. Not only does it force us to think about what we want to accomplish in a year, but it could be all wrong and if we change gears and end up doing something completely different, then that can wrongly make us feel as if we failed.
So, with that being said, I am all about setting goals, and such, but more important than all that I believe are habits.
Habits are the things you do day in and day out maybe without even realizing it and they make up your daily routine and sometimes your character. That fitness instructor that you admire and respect, maybe it’s because his habits are to wake up early every morning and go train and teach and coach regardless of whether or not he feels like it. He has made a habit of going, and that is who he is. There are countless examples I could give, but suffice it to say, our life is made up of habits. Some good. Some bad.
So, as we enter into this New Year, instead of making big over the top resolutions, consider first your habits and get back to basics with it being all about our mindset and perspective in life. Then, as you are growing and learning and changing, more habits are added and some taken away.
Here is a list of 10 Habits to Try This New Year!
1. Don’t take life too seriously.
I fully believe that a light-hearted, innocent, hopeful approach to life and all the days that make up our lives is like actual legit medicine for the mind, body, and soul.
There are so many people (maybe even you included) going through serious literal hell every day that it almost feels abrasive to those that are suffering if we take life too seriously.
OK, you barely passed that test you studied so hard for…you are still alive, breathing, and able to read and think. OK, you burned dinner and worked for hours stressing over a new recipe and feel like a failure…give yourself an A for effort..seriously! OK, you are 30 minutes late for a meeting that you scheduled months ago…it’s ok…you weren’t involved in that wreck ahead of you 10 miles that is what held up the traffic making you late.
It’s all about perspective and focusing on gratitude and rearranging our thought patterns.
2. Laugh at least once a day.
OK, I am telling y’all the God’s honest truth….LAUGHTER IS MEDICINE!
Don’t believe me?
Even when your nerves are at an all-time high and you are scared on the inside….it may sound crazy, but try laughter…i believe it’s like a pressure valve that can release so much of what you are feeling inside. Really not that much different than crying, it just doesn’t feel as heavy as tears.
I still remember the first time my mom laughed after coming home from the car wreck that left her a C1 quadriplegic. I actually felt offended that she could laugh because here she was suffering and this situation was crazy heavy flooded with grief and trauma and so much mental weight. I asked her, “How can you laugh Mom? Do you see me here not knowing what I am doing and you are distracting me and what if I accidentally did something wrong that costs you your life? This is not funny!”
She just kept laughing (which was hard to do on her ventilator). She didn’t explain or anything….she just kept laughing. All of a sudden, I couldn’t help myself, I started laughing and I could barely stop myself. Laughter can be a true Godsend that can relieve so much pressure. Try it…just let yourself be free for a moment.
3. Find at least ONE good thing in each and every day (Hint: I bet the list gets longer each day)
Even if the day is heavy, or just meh, or nothing special, I bet if you slow down enough, you will notice it.
The rustling of the leaves in the tree from the gentle wind.
The bumblebee gently resting on the flower for his food.
The messy muddy footprints on your sidewalk from the kids playing yesterday.
The half ripped rosemary plant reminding you of the kids playing camp in the yard yesterday and that was their food.
The cloudy day giving you a pause from the scorching sun.
The roof over your head providing you a safe haven from the world and the elements of nature.
4. Make an attempt each day to get outside and feel the ground under your feet.
As a kid, I LOVED and I mean loved, adored, longed for, and needed my outside time.
I looked forward to the weekend all week to go on my bike or feet with my friends. I even remember having snacks outside in the backyard and playing with my dog every day.
It is a different world now and outdoor time is not as natural anymore as it used to be. It has become something that has to be forced and even thought about as opposed to the natural element it used to be in our generation.
Make it intentional. Go outside. On your patio in the morning for coffee. In the afternoon for a leisurely or brisk walk for an afternoon pick me up. In the backyard in the evening playing with the kids. As you start to do this, it will become more of a draw to your soul and you will be spending more times outdoors, which is good for the soul!
5. Try each day to be in that very day…in that very moment.
OK, so this has been a real struggle for me in the past and I mean LEGIT REAL STRUGGLE.
I now can see looking back (and I still have to purposely choose this every moment of every day now) that it has so much to do with imagined responsibilities, imagined expectations, what others will think, and the list goes on and on.
But, if you CHOOSE to let go right now of everything for the day and just be right where you are and be nowhere else mentally, emotionally, physically.
What if you are watching your kids jump on the trampoline, but you aren’t actually…you are on your phone which means you aren’t really present with them…you are present on your phone.
It doesn’t mean that you can’t be on your phone ever…of course, many of us work from our phones and pay bills on our phone and there is nothing wrong with that. Just be sure you aren’t trying to “fill your moments with stuff” and as that happens you are actually missing the moments God gave you to treasure. Just try it a moment at a time. You may start to notice less anxiety, less stress, and less dependence on others expectations and more freedom to just be you in your world!
6. Exercise all of you!
You may be thinking what is she talking about here?
Well, I am referring to the many aspects of our human nature. We are physical, emotional, mental, spiritual beings.
So, as we think of excercising, most often, the body comes to mind, and I believe that can be life changing and effect all other aspects of our lives in a postive way! It has helped me countless times through desperate and traumatic times to be reminded I can still move and to do that as long as I am able. Don’t lock your mindset in that it has to look like a gym membership…go skiing, play at the trampoline park, run around outside with your kids and pets, anything!
But, it’s also important to exercise our mind. Read a book. Take a class in something you are interested in. Research a new technique you want to try. Try something new. Play with legos…yes Legos! There are even studies showing they may help fight off mental deterioration in old age. All of these are great for the mind and growth!
Praying and loving and reading the Bible are all our spiritual exercise, but that doesn’t stop there…if you have knowledge and not love, you have nothing we are told in 1 Corinthians 13:2. There is a serious problem going on in the churches today that can make others feel unwelcome….love is where it’s at people. He is a God of love and we are supposed to be displaying that love, so for our spiritual exercise, try loving others, regardless of who they are, their background, or anything else. Love conquers all.
7. Try to always find the good in everyone you meet.
OK, I know what you may be thinking…”But you don’t know my co-worker who is always trying to steal my glory, you don’t know how hateful the drive-through worker was to me, you don’t know my parent, or sibling, or whatever.”
I get it…..BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I TRULY LEGIT FEEL YOU HERE!
However, this has more to do with our own attitude choosing to keep their perspective glasses on and searching for the good.
Maybe if not the good, search for the “what if” in the person. If that co-worker is always trying to steal your thunder, no that doesn’t make it right, but maybe that person has literally nothing else. Maybe he lives alone and has no friends, no family, no life. Maybe work is all he has and he feels the need to put himself in the mix constantly. Hmmm….well, maybe next time it makes it a little easier to not let your heart get so burned by the frustration. Maybe the girl in the drive-through window just lost her mother and is still in shock and not dealing well.
We all go through stuff. It affects us all differently. This is not equivalent to taking abuse and putting up with behavior that makes you uncomfortable. Just be patient, as is possible, with those we meet trying to imagine what they may be going through. It helps keep your heart free of anger and that’s a good thing.
8. Don’t talk negatively about yourself to yourself for just one day. (Hint: I bet it becomes a habit).
OK, so I am sheepishly looking down and around with complete and utter guilt as if to be struck by lightning right now right here as I write this. Yes, guilty as charged. Even now, as God has been redeeming me from so much in my own life, and I have been finding Joy in being in the moment and not worrying about others expectations of me any longer, I find I am very hard on myself, and it’s seriously not good.
Maybe I am late for an appointment due to getting out the door late and I say to myself (unfortunately sometimes out loud and my sweet children hear me), “Good grief, I just can’t ever get out the door. What is wrong with me? I just can’t do anything right.”
OK, so my husband would look at me and say “well, that escalated quickly”. ha! My point is this….don’t we all do that somewhat on some level? If I do say it out loud, my girls or husband calls me out and I begin to replace it out loud with the truth. “I am thankful to have legs that work that can get out the door, even if we are late. Being late doesn’t mean there is something wrong with me. I can do a lot of things right. Now move on.”
9. Smile at everyone in your home and outside your home for just one day. (Hint: this is contagious).
Yes, smile!! It really is that simple. Not only does it encourage others around you and then they end up doing it as well (some of the time at least), but also, all the sudden your own heart feels lighter and more joyful and less serious.
Your approach to what is in front of you that day becomes more positive and it can even change your perspective on the day and maybe even come up with a new plan of action. It may feel awkward at first when you go out and about on your day or at home with the kids purposefully smiling, but it will become real and raw and contagious! Here’s looking at your smiles!!
10. Do the best you can today.
Let’s get real and basic. Wherever you are in life, whatever your “family” looks like right now, and wherever you are living, just do YOUR best in YOUR day. That will look different for all of us.
Do your very best at your job, your relationships, your day.
Why? Because as you get older and look back on your life, you want to be proud of yourself knowing you always gave your best in whatever it was that was in front of you. You will never get today back. Make it count.
If that is staying home and raising your children who are sick and you are barely making it through the day, but you kept your sick children taken care of and alive, count that as a win! If that is working your butt off at your job while you are crashing at someone’s home until you get your own place, that is a win! It doesn’t have to look like writing a book or musical, or making your first million dollars.
Just slow down, take a deep breath, and do the next thing in front of you with ALL YOU GOT! People are watching, even when you don’t know it, and you want to be a good example to others, but most of all yourself. Then, you can go to bed at night knowing you gave it your all and hold your head up high..THAT IS A WIN!
Today, I did my best to wake up early to work on this very article so I could have some family time later today. Comment below and share how you did your best today or tried one of the other promises on this list!
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